Today I celebrate 14 weeks free of the Breast Prosthetics!! The scars are still healing, the muscles are growing strong again and my sprits are high! Before the surgery I did an online event to share my photos of my first set of implants. This is the first time I share them here on this blog. In 1999 I went to a cosmetic surgeon to inquire about implants. My mother received implants from this man 10 years before I did, so naturally I went to him. She received over the muscle silicon implants. She also weighed about 20 pounds more then me. Now I am aware that carrying extra weight, even 20 pounds hides the il-effects of the implants. 
I was also unaware of the difference between a “Cosmetic Surgeon” and a “Plastic Surgeon” In previous blogs I detail the difference, but want to highlight today, my distain for this profession that uses women’s lack of self confidence to mutilate their bodies. The “doctor” (I use that term very lightly) did not tell me I was not a candidate for this surgery. My breast tissue was small and the implants lay over the muscle, therefore making the bag very easy to see. Also, there is not one Plastic Surgeon, that I have found, that preforms this TUBA<Trans Umbilical Breast Augmentation>procedure. The plastic surgeon that preformed the removal of my implants knew exactly who the “doctor” was that preformed my first surgery, and said he does at least one reparative surgery a week because of his work. The implants were put in threw my belly button, and as you can in the photo, there is a scar. When I google TUBA the sites do not show this truth. The rate of capsular contracture is also much higher with the TUBA, yet again on the web sites promoted by the “cosmetic surgeons” they do not say this, as a matter of fact they blatantly lie and say the risk with this surgery is much lower.
It took being off camera for the last surgeon to answer many of the questions I had regarding my first surgery. While I applaud the surgeon for the well job on the removal, there is still a part of me that is very unhappy with his ethics regarding the entire Breast Implant scene. Why do cosmetic surgeons still get to offer this surgery knowing the horrible outcome? Why, if he is correcting so many surgeries does he not call and report this surgeon. Basically, from my perception, if one surgeon is exposed, it will taint the whole scene. None of the surgeons preforming these surgeries are totally forth coming with evidence that implants are not always safe for every woman. Qualifications ad up to how much money the patient has.
I could not look at these photos for many years. It was not until November when I made the choice for removal that I even had the courage to show my partner of 2 years. Even viewing the photos was to painful.
I lived with the severe capusular contracture for 5 years. I did not wear a bathing suit and was very insecure with most shirts I wore because I could see the deformity through the shirt.
In the past I worked at a few strip clubs. Miami and New York.. not shabby clubs like one my find in Arkansas where I am from. I have seen the behind the scenes of breasts implants, and I will tell you, my story is more common then any doctor will lead you to believe. I have seen the breasts of a few women in Playboy, and photoshop is a forgiving tool used on every model in the magazine. There is no data base, or any agency collecting info on these prosthetics. I was never counted for.
Today I carry the scars of this “scarless” procedure. I am happier then I could have ever imagined to be Plastic Free. Today, I have the courage to post these photos for all to see. I want women to understand that one surgery will most likely lead to another. The FDA only approves implants for 10 years. This is my plea to the women reading this, do not mutilate your precious body. No matter what age or size you are now, this is not the answer to “feel more womanly”. Go take a yoga class or art class or grow a garden, there are many avenues we have available to tap into the divine goddess we are. Inserting plastic into our bodies, will not fill the void within. Feeling beautiful, I am now sure of, is an inside out job.~ Love & Light
